Thursday, February 10, 2011

Dealing With Bad News

It's inevitable that we're all going to receive some bad news at some stage in our lives: we didn't get that promotion we were looking for; that girl we're interested in has a boyfriend; a relative isn't going to get better; that manuscript we submitted has been rejected. The list goes on and on and obviously some cases are worse than others. But we have to deal with it, or let it tear us apart from the inside out.

Dealing with rejection, I know, is obviously a hard thing. No one's going to say that it's easy to be turned out by a person or a company. The key is to not let it get to you.

There are some very simple things that can be done to help you deal with bad news, before actually doing whatever possible to sort it out - this isn't a quick fix blog.

  1. Take a deep breath. Yes, breathing helps. We need it to live, and it can help calm us down. So inhale, hold it, then exhale slowly. Do it a few times if you're particularly panicky.
  2. Get some personal space or find a friend. The reason there's an "or" in there is, basically, because people are different. Some people need to be alone with their thoughts or some music or the sounds that flutter about all around them. Sometimes I'm that sort of person. Other times, I'm the "find a friend" sort of person. Whether you want to talk about what's going on or not, finding someone to talk to can be of some benefit. I don't always tell people what's wrong, if they sense something's wrong. That's my personal choice. I'm lucky that I have some friends who are good for just talking to, or who will do all the talking. I tend to make phone calls rather than trek to the bus stop... or to Meath... It makes the whole situation like being alone but with someone there.
  3. Stop thinking about it and try move on. This can take some time. I mean, no one's going to expect you to be on your feet and ready to go within the space of a couple of hours, or right away after following steps one and two. But eventually you have to let go of that friend who wasn't who you thought they were, or that job you thought was perfect for you, and find something new to aim for. Find a new friend, work hard to get that next promotion, and let all that horrible stuff holding you back -  while you let your tears go - go. But you have to stop thinking about it, too, until you're emotionally ready to think about it and not get upset all over again.
Most importantly, if you're in a sort of never-ending cycle of darkness, talk to someone who you know can help. I don't mean a professional, if that's not what you're in to (though it would help, if your situation was that bad), but at least a friend. We all have one friend we can trust, and if you don't feel like you can trust someone, you need to change something about yourself. People aren't the problem then, you are. Trust... it's important, you know? Maybe you don't tell someone the whole truth, but you at least let them in on something about you so you don't feel so alone.

I'll finish there before this turns into a lecture. But whoever you are reading this, wherever you are, remember that bad news or bad moods can be overcome. As desperate as things seem now, they can always get better. I promise you that, so long as you make the effort.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Books About Writing

I have a habit of buying books about writing. I can't help it. It's an affliction. But I enjoy it, and I enjoy reading those books from time to time and getting a different perspective on the craft. My books range from how to write books, in the areas of novels, creative writing, children's books and poetry, to useful things about the business of writing. I'm constantly getting more books, so this list is by no means complete.

Teach Yourself 

Teach Yourself Writing A Novel (Teach Yourself: Writing)The Teach Yourself series of books, I find can be quite helpful in getting the info you need in a concise manner. While I wouldn't necessarily say they are the only place to go to while looking for a book on writing, they certainly do contribute. Definitely trustworthy! Here is a list of the books I have in the series related to writing:

 Alison Baverstock

Is There a Book in You?This author has three books I find to be of great importance for people who wish to write or work with books - three that I've read, at least. I can't stress enough how much I would swear by what Alison Baverstock says: she's worked in the industry, she's gotten books published, she's in the know. In order of what I deem to be the most important books for writers to read, her titles include:
She also has quite a few books on parenting, if you're into that sort of thing.

Miscellaneous Others

Beyond that, I don't have multiples of anything by the same author/publisher. What's left is a mishmash of titles I've found that looked interesting and/or helpful, some of which are of great importance for a writer, and others are just helpful in different ways.
As well as those, I find it helpful for writers to have copies of The Writers and Artists Yearbook, a dictionary, maybe a copy of Eats, Shoots and Leaves and perhaps something along the lines of Bill Bryson's Dictionary for Writers and Editors.

While none of these books can guarantee success, having a look at one of two of them doesn't hurt. It can certainly help in figuring out the craft a bit, and getting someone else's perspective on how to write in a particular genre. My list isn't complete, by far, of course. I still plan on getting more books in the Teach Yourself series, and who knows what else will wander into my collection. All the time I'll justify the purchase of these books with the knowledge that they can be very helpful in getting an insight into the world of books and writing.

Review - Dead Until Dark

Dead Until Dark (Sookie Stackhouse/True Blood)During the Christmas holiday from college, I got to watching True Blood - I mentioned this in my last post, and how it got me to reading the books the show is based on. And I mean based. The books have some distinct differences from the show (or vice versa, it depends on which you came to first, I suppose). I won't go into these differences, because I can't think of them all right now.

So... was the book good?
It was. It was good, and it was great, and then it was fantastic, and then it was great again. That's sort of how every book goes. Some skip the "good" and just get into great. While Charlaine Harris's Dead Until Dark doesn't fit, for me, into the instantly great category, it still escapes the drastically bad category. There wasn't a single bad moment in it.

Seriously? Not a single bad moment?
Oh, okay there was. When it ended. It was the sort of book you wanted to keep reading (read as: It was  the sort of book I didn't want to stop reading!). Between the book and the show, I began thinking about loud in a Louisiana accent. Damn infectious literature!

Okay, so how were the myths of the book?
Rather fantastically. That's the simple answer. If you really require more info... well, the vampires, as anyone who watches the show or has read the books can tell you, are not immune to sunlight. The vampires are also not affected by religious icons - considering the fact that there have been vampires in the book's universe for longer than there have been Christians, this isn't surprising. But vampires aren't all we've got. I won't spoil too much, but Sookie is a telepath (it's in the blurb, I don't feel bad for telling you). Sookie, if you don't know, is the protagonist and narrator. She's also a waitress. (Ah her classic response to the question, "What are you?") While I feel Harris could have done a better job with the telepathy, it was still written quite well into the story, and it doesn't feel out of place.

How does the book compare to similar titles?
My experience with the genre is limited. Being part of the whole 'Paranormal Romance' section of bookshops, I avoided the books for quite some time. Eventually I was talked into it by a couple of people who assured me they weren't too girlie. They were right. I've read much more girlie books along the same lines - Twilight, being the prime example. So, how does Dead Until Dark compare to that? Well, the myth of the vampires is much better, the writing is much better, the story is much better, and the protagonist isn't in any way annoying. There's also less disturbance to be experienced, since Sookie is older than Bella Swan of Twilight. While the age difference between Bill and Sookie is still massive, at least she's legally of age to... you know... do it. And the romance of the book is a whole lot less desperate.

Ending the rant, do you recommend this book?
Wholeheartedly! Especially if you like HBO's adaptation of the books in the form of True Blood and you're prepared to accept the differences between the original books and the television series. Or you're into Paranormal Romance but you don't want something terrible like Twilight. Or you just like the Paranormal side of things (which was where I was, before seeing the show, but turned off by the romance) and you can stand to read the romance too.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Since I've Been Gone

It's been about two months since I posted. There's a very good reason for this - I'm lazy. I sort of gave up on the Internet as a form of communication for a long while, and while I hope to blog a lot now that I'm "back", I don't think I'll be doing much else in such proportions. I like talking to people face to face, not through "chat" on Facebook; I like actually doing things rather than just talking about them; but I also like writing, hence the blogging.

In short, I haven't done much since I last posted. I had a quiet Christmas with my family (couldn't get away from them, actually...), and Christmas week I went to Newgrange. By accident we (my friend and I) went the day before the solstice. We were really just looking for something to do, since we hadn't seen each other in about six weeks.

I'm not going to list everything I received for Christmas from my family, though I'll give special mention to the True Blood DVDs I got. The only reason I'm mentioning them is because I've watched the first two seasons and I'm currently watching season three on FX. Also, I've started reading the books they're based on. Loads of fun, them! I've only read one so far, but I have the second one.

A review of that will come soon. I've also got a few other books to review... I read them in a binge session. It was a delightful time. Loved the books I read and can't wait to tell you what they are. But not yet.

See, I'm plotting out a new format for my blog. I want to do reviews on Wednesdays. It's to encourage me to read more. I have four books to review so far, and many more to read in the meantime, so the next month's worth of reviews will just be what I read within a short space of time. But I'll be reading more, like the books for my English course, and some stuff on my Education and Theology courses. More on those later. The blog will have other stuff, too, like original pieces of fiction or poetry, but with a very particular reason behind them...

See, I went to a workshop hosted by Gavin Kostick and arranged by the Irish Student Drama Association. It was a good ol' day, that, and I learned quite a bit. I intend to put it to good practice. One of things he suggested will be part of this blog, when I get around to initiating it. That won't be until at least this Monday. I'll have other things popping up as weekly or monthly features in the future, but not just yet.

Oh, I also wrote a movie! It's not very long, but it's been entered into a competition in college. It's a sort of zombie apocalypse movie. I really enjoyed writing it!

And... well, aside from buying more books, rearranging my bookshelf, working, writing a bit, reading and college, I've only done one other significant thing that I can convince myself to talk about - teaching practice. Now, nothing against the students or the school, because they were actually quite nice, but I don't think I could ever teach at primary level. There's a particular type of energy with kids of that age, and it was sort of damaging to my existence. I think the stress of TP, overall, caused me to have at least three emotional breakdowns. I feel so bad for the friend who had to put up with all of that.

So, I'm back...ish. We'll see if it lasts. But for now, I've got to do stuff. Blogging, as fun as it is, isn't entirely productive. Or entirely in-keeping with my 'Reactivate everything today' plan... This is why people shouldn't leave! Too much catching up to do - and there's always catching up to do!

Monday, December 6, 2010

This Christmas

Right, I'm slightly broke. The last two years, I gave out Christmas cards, and this year I don't think I can afford to actually buy enough cards for everyone. It may be that I only give cards to a small number of people, namely those I don't see very often and the person I have for my Chris Kindle in college, and that'd be it. This effectively means that I'm giving out *does quick math* seven cards. Seven.

I don't want to look cheap, but really - Paulie is broke. I still have to pay for all the family Christmas presents this year. And by that I mean I have to figure out what I'm getting people first. And yes, I know Christmas is only a few weeks away. This is why I am writing about it now. Now is the perfect time to panic.

See, I like to give people cards. I just can't. Not this year, anyway. I won't have enough money to buy cards for people until two days before Christmas, and sure I won't be able to write and post all those cards in everyone to get them before Christmas. If I had some other alternative, it'd be great... but it looks like only a small number of people will be getting cards this year. Bummer.

It's kind of my favourite part of Christmas - giving people cards and presents. So not having enough money to do it kind of makes Christmas less fun this year.

Ah!

(That was a frustration "ah", not an I Have an Idea "ah". Okay, I might have an idea... but it is unrelated to the "ah" and I still need to figure out how to do it and whether it is worth it or not.)

Oh Christmas, why did you have to become so commercialised? Things would be so much easier if I just had to pray for everyone. Instead I've set myself a standard of sending them all a card. No! I can't do it this year. I have to get the family presents!

Sorry everyone who doesn't get a card from me... I have a very limited budget. (Painfully limited).

Sunday, December 5, 2010

In Reality - A Poem

He wondered in through the foggy falling mist
Wearing a silly grin and an attitude that couldn't be matched,
Taking control of the situation and the lives of those he touched,
Carefully becoming a part of their whole.
That isn't to say he was the same for everyone.
He has two faces I've grown familiar with:
The cheery, smiling person who everyone loves,
Always there, always helpful, full of chatter;
And the angry, violent deviant,
A haunting figure with an evil stare.
One is to be missed,
And fear comes from losing him;
The other is to be dreaded,
And there's only fear surrounding him.
They look the same,
And I swear in reality they are the same person.
But truly
How do we tell who he really is?

Is he the mask of sorrow or the one of joy?
In reality, I don't know.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

New Year's Resolutions

Let me just start by saying - I know it's only December 4th. I know! It's a long way until the New Year still (okay, 4 weeks until New Year's Eve...) but that doesn't mean we don't have to think about the future. In case you haven't experienced this yet, the future has a way of sneaking up on us and becoming the present.

It's too easy to make up loads of stuff on New Year's Eve and think, "Yeah, I'll do that." But you know what..? It's not easy to go ahead with them. Want proof?

Below is my list from this year. I posted it 48 weeks ago. Did I do any of it..?
  • Spend at least five hours a week reading something that's not college related (unless the pressure of college mounts up and I have no choice) - Short answer, no. I get lazy. Reading takes time and I sometimes like to pretend I have none.
  • Spend at least five hours a week writing or editing my own work (unless college + pressure = no choice) - Eh... fail. I wrote a lot during the summer, but not five hours every week, and not during all the other months too.
  • Blog at least twice a week, because I've become very bad at that, and it really needs to change - Actually, yes! Aside from the points in year where I decided not to blog, I think I pulled this one off. Okay, not all the time, I'll admit. Probably not even twice a week. But I wrote quite a lot on the blog this year!
  • Review every book I read from now on, including some of the ones I've already read (this will work in conjunction with my YouTube channel, I think) - If memory serves me right, yes I did this one. I think... must have... maybe...
  • Start a bookclub on my YouTube channel - Uh huh! And it got people reading some books, too. So it was a success!
  • Start my autograph boook (or at least get more than one signature - thank you Jackie Kessler!) - Um... no. I didn't get another signature (yet). The problem, of course, is that the one time during the year that I met Darren Shan, I forgot the autograph book and my camera. And I didn't meet any other "famous" people other than that. Boo!
  • Finish Meet Sam - 2010 is my year, I know it. I can do this. I have to. Then I'll get my other work noticed, like The Jump and The Magical Emporium of Magical Things (I started that three days ago - nice title, eh? ^_^) - Would you believe, I actually did more work on Meet Sam, but it actually created more work as well. I got a lecturer (or two) to read it, and she suggested some things to improve on. So I found lots of areas that need more writing added to them... and that meant I was suddenly a bit overwhelmed by the book. I've added to it... just not enough. And then I need to edit it.
  • Complete NaNoWriMo for the third year running - I would say I tried... but to be honest I only really started. I gave up after 5000 words, but not because I didn't like the book. I just didn't have any time (too many assignments).
So there you have it - I failed at New Year. This year, I'm starting early. I want to do one thing and one thing only in 2011. I want to actually finish Meet Sam. When the Christmas break hits me (only one more week of college left!) I'm going to be dividing my time between Teaching Practice work, family & friends and Meet Sam. I hope to get it done by February and then submit it to a publisher. I already have one in mind, so that's a load off. I just need to master the art of writing a synopsis and a cover letter. (fun times...)

I'm saying this early on so I don't let myself get distracted in a week. This day next week I'm going to wake up (relatively) early, take out my Meet Sam files and get to work on the book. I have my work timetable already for the whole of December, so I can work all my other plans around that. I'll be working on that fairly soon, actually, getting a timetable together to plan everything perfectly. I have a couple of plans for during the Christmas break, but other than that I'm a free man.

So... New Year's Resolutions, anyone?