Stuff's messed up. Let's leave it at that - vague and possibly interesting. It's not my place to go into this. Even if I get permission to start talking freely about this, I won't.
Basically, the Thing has come has quite a shock. Sort of emotionally crippling. That's just the way I am. So I have to find a way to cope. Normally I write, but I can't seem to find the words. They just don't seem to matter very much. All the fiction in the world doesn't seem to have as much importance as the Thing.
So I'm doing all I can to cope with this. This starts with Research. In this case, Research led me to a website that I had to do some thinking over. I have been called Detective Carroll before, and it is for stuff like this (and my ability to observe when something has happened... and those times when I state the obvious.) So I started joining the dots. I had to ask a few (too many) questions, but I have a better understanding of the Thing.
It still bothers me. It won't stop bothering me until the Thing becomes a Thing of the Past, and even then this is based on the outcome of the Coping Mechanism.
See, fiction isn't helping. Not this time. So I have to resort to facts. I'm beginning to see the Bigger Picture of the Thing. I can't do much to help with it, so I can only offer small insights into my understanding of the Thing. This might help. I really, really hope it helps. If it doesn't, I need to find a new Coping Mechanism for the Downside of the Aftermath of Failure.
I have a Plan. I obviously can't keep hanging about looking for a way to Cope with Nothing. So I need to build a Contingency Plan that will go forth regardless of the Outcome of the Thing. No matter what happens with the Thing - which I believe can still come out Okay - I want to make sure everything else isn't destroyed.
So, that's what's happening. This is why I've been acting so weird. And yes, I am aware there is an annoying amount of capitalised words in this post. Deal with it.