A New Adventure

Something happened to me a couple of years ago that made me stop and look at my life as boring. I mean, I love writing. I love college, however odd that might be. I even like teaching and working in the bookshop. But I foresee a lot of repetitiveness in this life. Weekends at the shop can get very boring, especially when there are very few customers around. If I didn't need the money, and if it wasn't a handy place to work to get books and keep learning about them, I would like to leave. (In saying that, I love having a job, and I love the people I work with... I just know that I couldn't do that my whole life.)

Even teaching, however different the challenges will be every day, might become boring. (Of course, that does mean I would be doing it wrong...) I just feel that my life might become too much of a career. Yes, that's a good thing for some people, but I don't want to feel trapped by my job.

Writing will let me get away from the mundaneness of reality, but in the end it's not quite the same as living a life. There's more to life than just existing, and that's the problem with working in the bookshop and teaching for a living: there's the risk that all I would end up doing is existing.

I want to live, and that means more to me than just staying alive. I want to travel. I want to see things I've never seen before, meet new people, try new things. I don't want to just hear about life from other people. That's not good enough for me. If I can help it, I won't be staying still for most of my life (you know, unless you discount sitting in a chair to write my books).

And of course, even that life of getting around and seeing the world and meeting new people isn't complete if that's all I do. Then I just become a traveller. I want to write new fiction, push the boundaries of what I'm capable of and deliver new stories to people. Yesterday, two ideas I had for books - one of them a standalone, the other initially a series of adventures - suddenly expanded and grew. The standalone book takes my current Dungeons and Dragons character idea (I'm that cool) and mixes it with an idea for a novel I got many years ago. It's possible the standalone book will become a series or a trilogy in its own right.

The series of adventures has become something much bigger. I can't even talk about it or I'll give stuff away, but it's going to be one of the most enjoyable things I'll ever write, and it has so much potential to keep on growing. I want to write it after the Sam Richards and The Daughters of the Muse trilogies, or at least get a start on it. I couldn't even tell you how many books it will contain, at the moment, because it's just an idea, but it's going to take up a huge amount of my time.

Both are fantasy ideas, I should point out. That's the beauty of the adventure that is writing: every time I write a new story, I'm brought somewhere fantastical. Even with the Sam Richards Trilogy, set in Dublin, I'll be experiencing the world in a new way: I have to create a life I will never lead and look at the city I've known my whole life through the eyes of a different man. It's possible I'll write spin-offs to that trilogy, too, but that's all in the future when I can think about things other than the main books.

This isn't just the wild dream of a young man from Ireland. This isn't just some take on The Simpsons ("I want to live Marge! Why won't you let me live?!") or some flight of fancy that will go away. I want to get published, and not just once. I want to show people stories and I want to escape the trap of life that is repetition. So I won't be rich, not travelling and writing for a living (that's the ambition, anyway), but I know I'll be happy.

And as for teaching... well, that's for when I want to settle down. After all, aren't all teachers as old as the pyramids, anyway?

Inspiration and November

This seems the sort of post that belongs on my website, but this is more subjective mumblings as opposed to an objective advice article. I had lectures, this week, on Keats - you know, the great Romantic poet who died young, that guy. There was nothing especially inspirational in terms of stories in the poems that we looked at, not for me, anyway, at that particular moment in time.

The inspiration came from the lecture's choice of words. I won't reveal them. See, he used an expression to describe what Keats might have been writing about, and the four words he used have inadvertently given me an idea for a novel. The idea sort of clicked straight away, but I have a rule: leave it a day.

So, yesterday morning I thought about it properly again. I looked at those four words, which I wrote down separate to my notes, and the whole thing came flooding back in more detail. My head works weirdly that way, and I took advantage of it. Over a cup of tea and listening to The Saw Doctors on the bench just outside my college in the smoking area, I started to plan the book.

This is one of those books that would be categorised incorrectly if it was in a bookshop. It's a paranormal. It has some romantic elements. It would be classified as a paranormal romance, but it's not. Paranormal romance implies that the romance is paranormal, when the book has wholly independent paranormal and romantic elements. There are no vampires, werewolves or any other Gothic clichés that have been overdone in the last six years in the world of teenage fiction.

I am tempted to write the book for NaNoWriMo, but it occurs to me that actually taking part in NaNoWriMo will be impossible with college this year. While I do have a lovely break from college at the very start of November, I will be in France with no Internet connection, laptop, or privacy. This is part of my course.

When I get back, I will need to have two essays written by the following Thursday. Towards the end of the month, I will need to have written a journal of at least ten pages on Gothic films and books. Before the end of the semester, I will need to create two podcast-type documents - one audio, one video - for another module, while also getting a project about France done. This project will need to include more information than I currently have on a number of religious figures and movements.

I will also be taking part in an intensive, involuntary teaching programme. I will need lessons plans and I will need to teach. To add to this, I will need to get schemes of work done for my teaching in January. I'll also have to visit the school, and though it's local, this will take up a whole day in itself.

I have no problem doing this work. I accept that it is part of my college course. My problem is that I don't also have the time to write a novel, especially not if I'm losing several days at the start of the month. I have to run my college's magazine, The Scribbler, while also writing a short story for my website and another for the book I'm putting together in college. In short, I will be busy with these minor extra curricular activities.

And guess what? That's not it. While running The Scribbler and while writing two short stories, on top of all of the work I have to do, I will also be part of the play the Drama Soc are putting on. I don't yet know how much time that will take up. I also have two more poetry writing workshops to attend during the month of November. That's more time gone.

The simple fact of the matter is that, because of the sheer volume of work I have to do, I will not be able to partake in NaNoWriMo this year. I will still be writing various things, like essays and short stories and articles for my website, but I will not be able to focus on writing 1667 words a day, particularly not when I will be losing so many days. I won't even get into the climb of Croagh Patrick (again) in November.

What I will be doing is writing about NaNoWriMo. I plan on adding a "pep talk" to my website for each week in the month. I may write about characters and plots and settings and making things believable, and how to avoid stressing out, how to stop your family from annoying you and how to live with a writer (for the families that are cursed with one of us!). I just can't focus on a novel with all the work I have to do that is suddenly three times as much work as we'll have had to do since third year started.

I don't regret this decision. Yes, it means I won't reach my own personal deadlines, but I can still work on things, like editing Meet Sam, during the month, especially if I'm going to be stuck on a plane and on buses for three of the thirty days in the month, between France and the mountain out west. I would like to actually get that done properly, so I could finally move on with the damn thing. I'll probably need to print out a few different parts of the book, get a blank page or two and draft the additional details and scenes that will not only bulk up the book, but also make it better - there's so much depth not yet explored in it that a lecturer of mine was kind enough to mention when she read it, and I think the book will benefit greatly from this stuff.

I just need to actually get myself to do it. On that note... *reminds self to copy the post-it notes onto less sticky paper* It's something I can work on in France and on the bus to and from Croagh Patrick and in the mornings over a cup of tea. This novel is important to me, having evolved from an idea adapted from a film and a vision of this city I live in to something more and greater than that. It's a novel that doesn't draw on the lives of those around me. It's a novel I can be proud of, having written it in the November before my Leaving Cert exams. Even since then, it's stuck with me. I can't just abandon it now.

Is it foolish to imagine a dedication for the book already? Possibly. That's another little secret of mine, that tiny little message to go in the front of the book that not everyone takes notice of. I guess, of all the people I can think of dedicating my début novel to, this one just feels more right. Suppose I just have to make sure that happens by finishing and then submitting the book, eh?

Deadlines Approaching!

My website is, hopefully, being launched on September 11th. I have a lot of stuff to do between now and then, but I chose the date for one reason and one reason only: it's the day before I go back to college. I want to have the website up and running with content to view (and share?) before then, but I'd be too pushed for time to try get everything done before then.

Because I slacked a little the past couple of days, I have to play catch-up on my workload. I've got to write four scenes of The Rest is Silence, which will be no small feat, and that's only one of the many things I have to do. Thankfully it's also the only explicitly creative goal for the day, the rest being website work, editing, etc.

I have to finish editing a short story - the first short story that will be going on my website. That's my primary concern, because I don't want that section to be blank when I launch. The story is called Dear World, but I can't tell you much more about it without spoiling it. It's something I hope people like, that they can maybe connect to, but that I mainly wrote upon seeing a publication opportunity. It wasn't accepted, but then I didn't really believe it would be. I still like the story, though, so I'm posting it online. I just don't believe in posting on a website someone else set up. This is my baby, so it's staying in my house.

Once that's all done, I have to get some poems selected for the launch of the site. I'm not the best poet in the world, but some of the stuff I've shown people has been liked, so I'm going to share it through the website. I sometimes write with particular people in mind, other times I find the connection with a person after it's written. (Classic example in my novel Meet Sam was realising how much like Nick a friend from college was, who I didn't meet until ten months after the novel was written!)

To finish off my day, I have to type up articles for the website. I have five categories for non-fiction on the website, and each one needs a piece written in it by launch day. Of course, I need more pieces to post in the future, which is where next week's workload comes in. I have to write more articles, edit something, get more poems ready, and work on the banner. Still working that one out, mind you!

See, I have deadlines for a lot of stuff. All the basics for the website need to be ready by the 11th at the latest, but preferably the 10th. My play, The Rest is Silence, needs to be written, typed and edited by the time college starts back on the 12th. I'm not in until the afternoon, but I don't want to be working on it, then. I have a deadline list, and the play needs to be finished so I can write my novels throughout the college year, while continuing to work on the website and for The Phantom Zone, and then I'll get into the heavy planning stage of my X-Men story that I've been talking about on Twitter and Facebook; that needs to be planned in some details by December 10th.

I might be mad with the amount of work I'm taking on, but I wholly believe it's possible to do all of this. And hey, there's a reason I chose December 10th - Christmas break! I will finally be able to collapse, then, after a tiring first semester! (I'm not entirely sure of the date I'm off, but that's my deadline, anyway!) In the meantime, I have to get a lot of other stuff ready, before I even go back to college. I don't think I'll ever stop working, you know that? It's like I'd heard on the radio, and mentioned a short while ago, a professional does the work even when he doesn't feel like it. Thankfully I happen to know some amazing people who will make the winding-down periods in my life so much better!

Fear and Other Things

So I have a theory which I am presupposing is accurate - people are afraid of following their dreams. Not everyone, but a lot of people, myself included. I was thinking about it on the way home from college, a book in a folder in my hand and the sun making me regret wearing my big green coat that really just killed me towards the end of the day. I wrote the book over two years ago. I have done no work on the book in about eight months. In that time I wrote three somewhat good novellas - they have potential, but they're nowhere near what I'd like them to be - and I started at least three other books that never got further than a few thousand words. But I haven't done what's important towards getting published, and that's finishing this one really important book.

The fear, I suppose, is that if I got published and if I'm to believe a friend that it'll make me "millions", my whole life would change. I would lose that drive to finish my college course, and maybe I'd become so involved in my own newly developing world that I'd give up all the people I care about. It's not uncommon for me to drift from social group to social group, to sometimes become entirely self-involved (without rubbing my existence in anyone's face, mind you, just not paying entirely enough attention to everyone else). It's my nature to become distracted by new and shiny things, and I worry (maybe that's the wrong word) that if I ever got anywhere I wanted to I'd leave behind the foundations of that life and lose the people I cared about because I stopped paying attention for just a bit too long.

I think that fear stems from my misunderstanding of people, jumbled up with the aforementioned self-involvement. It's as if, sometimes, if I annoy someone or if I don't talk to them, that I'll just slip too far away from them to matter anymore, as if my parting in one way or another matters so much that I won't get back. So, if I got published, if I became successful, then I'd be leaving behind the people I care about; not in spite, not in anger or because of an argument, but because I'd have to focus so much on doing something that's important to me, and this new and shiny adventure I'm on would bypass any need to keep in touch with people.

And I have the same fear that once people get over their own inhibitions or the obstacles set up by other people on their lives that maybe I'd be all forgotten about, or worse that I am one of the obstacles in their way and I'd have to give up one of my friends for them to be happy. I assume the absolute worst, sometimes, and I cannot help that, particularly if I get caught in some sort of downward spiral, and sometimes that feeling of being an obstacle just doesn't go away.

This fear I have, this multitude of fears that I have, is something I am sure that lots of people go through. It's why we procrastinate, is it not? It's why people don't study even when they want to do well, because it's like if they apply themselves then everything will change. Or worse: they don't think they're good enough, regardless of whether or not they study. I was like that. I know I could have done better in my Leaving Certificate, but I didn't do the work. That's my own fault, but it was fear of under-succeeding that got to me, and the fear that everything would change after the exams.

But there is the truth - things have to change. In the exam situation, whether you pass or fail subjects, things will change anyway. Everything changes, though not immediately, and what many people, myself included, sometimes fail to realise is that it's up to us to decide how our lives should change. While I don't encourage cutting people loose from your life, I do suggest that people do something selfish, do something for themselves, something that will make them, and them alone, happy. Whether it's going for that job they don't think they deserve, finishing the book and submitting it to a publisher or anything else that won't directly hurt someone (because obviously if you get the job or if you get published, it can significantly reduce the chances that someone else will get the same benefits... but remember: this is about you!), people ought to chase their dreams, big or small.

It's impossible to be completely released from our inhibitions, but we can sure as heck make an effort to overcome the challenges that hold us back. At the risk of being preachy (oh, too late),I'm going to finish by saying that people need to take control of their own lives. We don't have to do everything our parents want from us - such as becoming a teacher after doing this course I'm in  rather than pursuing some other career - and we don't have to be held back by their decisions about something that we disagree with entirely, that affect us negatively. If you want to go to college against their wishes, pay for it yourself. Find your passion and live it, be happy, and the rest will work out around it.

And when you get scared, what then?

I talk about it. Not always quite so publicly as this, but to a close friend. I imagined most of this being said to a friend without him being able to respond because it let me get things straight in my head, but really this isn't something I think I could have said to him - whether he was sober or drunk and calling at three in the morning - because I wouldn't have been able to put the words right out loud for fear of sounding like I was trying to take control of his life of have him make my decisions for me. But that's just me - I'm a complicated individual. But talking about fear, talking about the things that hold us back, is the first step towards overcoming those obstacles so we can get on with the race.

That was preachy, wasn't it? Sure, what about it? Live your life, live your dreams, be yourself and get over your fears. And do as I say, not as I do, because odds are I won't follow my own advice, whether it's good or bad.

New Year's Resolutions

Let me just start by saying - I know it's only December 4th. I know! It's a long way until the New Year still (okay, 4 weeks until New Year's Eve...) but that doesn't mean we don't have to think about the future. In case you haven't experienced this yet, the future has a way of sneaking up on us and becoming the present.

It's too easy to make up loads of stuff on New Year's Eve and think, "Yeah, I'll do that." But you know what..? It's not easy to go ahead with them. Want proof?

Below is my list from this year. I posted it 48 weeks ago. Did I do any of it..?

• Spend at least five hours a week reading something that's not college related (unless the pressure of college mounts up and I have no choice) - Short answer, no. I get lazy. Reading takes time and I sometimes like to pretend I have none.
• Spend at least five hours a week writing or editing my own work (unless college + pressure = no choice) - Eh... fail. I wrote a lot during the summer, but not five hours every week, and not during all the other months too.
• Blog at least twice a week, because I've become very bad at that, and it really needs to change - Actually, yes! Aside from the points in year where I decided not to blog, I think I pulled this one off. Okay, not all the time, I'll admit. Probably not even twice a week. But I wrote quite a lot on the blog this year!
• Review every book I read from now on, including some of the ones I've already read (this will work in conjunction with my YouTube channel, I think) - If memory serves me right, yes I did this one. I think... must have... maybe...
• Start a bookclub on my YouTube channel - Uh huh! And it got people reading some books, too. So it was a success!
• Start my autograph boook (or at least get more than one signature - thank you Jackie Kessler!) - Um... no. I didn't get another signature (yet). The problem, of course, is that the one time during the year that I met Darren Shan, I forgot the autograph book and my camera. And I didn't meet any other "famous" people other than that. Boo!
• Finish Meet Sam - 2010 is my year, I know it. I can do this. I have to. Then I'll get my other work noticed, like The Jump and The Magical Emporium of Magical Things (I started that three days ago - nice title, eh? ^_^) - Would you believe, I actually did more work on Meet Sam, but it actually created more work as well. I got a lecturer (or two) to read it, and she suggested some things to improve on. So I found lots of areas that need more writing added to them... and that meant I was suddenly a bit overwhelmed by the book. I've added to it... just not enough. And then I need to edit it.
• Complete NaNoWriMo for the third year running - I would say I tried... but to be honest I only really started. I gave up after 5000 words, but not because I didn't like the book. I just didn't have any time (too many assignments).

So there you have it - I failed at New Year. This year, I'm starting early. I want to do one thing and one thing only in 2011. I want to actually finish Meet Sam. When the Christmas break hits me (only one more week of college left!) I'm going to be dividing my time between Teaching Practice work, family & friends and Meet Sam. I hope to get it done by February and then submit it to a publisher. I already have one in mind, so that's a load off. I just need to master the art of writing a synopsis and a cover letter. (fun times...)

I'm saying this early on so I don't let myself get distracted in a week. This day next week I'm going to wake up (relatively) early, take out my Meet Sam files and get to work on the book. I have my work timetable already for the whole of December, so I can work all my other plans around that. I'll be working on that fairly soon, actually, getting a timetable together to plan everything perfectly. I have a couple of plans for during the Christmas break, but other than that I'm a free man.

So... New Year's Resolutions, anyone?

NaNo '10

There are two weeks to go until NaNoWriMo 2010, and I still don't know if I'll definitely be taking part. It would mean writing a lot of college stuff over the midterm break, which I am more than happy to do, and using lunch times that would otherwise go wasted on writing the novel and juggling all my other college work. It would mean using every last available minute writing the book, in between the nights out I am determined not to miss and the teaching practice material I have to put together... like 30 lessons and three schemes of work...

Aside from the whole 'having another first draft' thing, I have another motive for taking part - I need to get the voice of the narrator in Meet Sam back into my head, and the only way to do that is to write the second book in the trilogy, Love, Sam. So between now and November 1st I need to plot that book and write two essays of 1500-2000 words and two sets of tutorial work... fun times!

It can be done, though. I get off college at half four on Mondays. I can write for an hour or two without jeopardising my college work. On Tuesdays, I'm in until half five. Sometimes later. The nights are touch-and-go. I have a long lunch, though, so I could write then. Wednesdays I'm off at half four again, with a long lunch, too, and no one goes out on a Wednesday. Thursdays are strange: every second week I get off at half two, while the other weeks I get off at half four. I can write on the half two days, but the nights out are always on Thursdays. Fridays are touch-and-go; I don't know, as of yet, whether or not I have work every Friday after college. I get off at twelve, though, so I could spend time writing then - a few hours' work and a few thousand words. Saturdays I work, usually for six hours. I also do my tutorial work on Saturdays... But that shouldn't stop me doing work on the novel. Sundays I have four to six hours, too, in work, and again I can do work before and after.

However, I have to do a lot of reading for college, too. I need to read a tragic play and write an essay on it, and write a coursework journal based on the films we watch on the late Tuesdays. I have three essays due in in November - one of which I would want to write most of during the October break - and I have four tutorials to prepare work for during the month, too. And, again, my schemes of work. Fun... I need to do work for those, too. I need to read for three essays and three schemes of work. It may kill me.

But what about the book? Okay, if I use Write or Die I can get about 400 words done every ten minutes. So in an hour I can get - roughly - 2400 words done. If I wrote for one hour - like this - every day in November, I would get 72000 words done in the month. This is more than enough. I will most likely write less. I imagine it will turn out closer to 55000 words, because even if I wrote like this all the time, I would not write every day.

Do I have a plot..? Not exactly. I have a general idea but nothing too substantial. Which is bad, for me. For a book of this length and for such a short period of high-stress time, I need a plan. I will probably work on this during the week - likely before my next drama workshop. I have my characters already, anyway. I have written about them on this blog, previously. I can come up with a story that fits them all in that doesn't avoid the direction I want the book to take. This will, hopefully, have some of the same humour as Meet Sam while also getting down into this really dark level of the human psyche, which was my intention for this book all those months ago when I first thought of it.

I suppose, though, with my idea I have somewhere to aim for. I have thought processes that need to be explored, places that need to be visited narratively, and people that need to influence the mind and emotions of Samuel Emily Richards.

Am I excited? Oh God yes. Lets get ready to WriMo!

Post-its

 My bedroom wall is a mess of post-its and madness. The snake is long, 53 post-its long. Yes, 53. It started off looking like this:

Let me explain; I'm story boarding. This is the first step in my story boarding. Each post-it is a chapter in the book. Admittedly, that's a lot of chapters. Especially since it's not a very long book. But still, the chapters themselves are important. I might add, though, that there will probably be more chapters. This line of post-its on my wall is based on the first draft; the second draft of the book, which has been added to already, requires that I add more detail to certain areas of the book.

The story board became something like this, then. As you can tell, it's a bit wibbly-wobbly. These post-its were very kind, though. They stayed in the right place... mostly. The ones under the loop are evil and kept deciding to move. So I stuck one of them there with blue tack. At this point in the book, there has been a lot talking about something happening and a comparison between two of the female characters. It's a relatively small cast of characters, I might add. Because the book was originally only fifty thousand words long, I didn't want to get trapped by lots of voices all trying to speak.

The snake grew longer. It's sort of like the game on old mobile phones, with all snake getting longer the further into the game you get. The post-its increase in number as time goes by in the book.

This is all Meet Sam, I might add. It started off as a simple idea, and became something more than I thought I could handle. At this point, the second draft calls for taking from recent experiences with doubt and depression and writing an emotional and mental breakdown. I wasn't ready for something like that a few weeks ago. Now, unfortunately, I am.

That seems like I'm complaining about being able to write my own book. I suppose I am. I've had a tough summer, but it's allowed me to have a look at a more human way of dealing with the world. It's not all just words anymore. This book is becoming a transformative experience of its own. It's allowing me to look into the life of my protagonist and apply my own problems accordingly with his. Circumstantially things are different, but the end result of deep despair is the same. However, the snake unwinds. Things aren't all jumbled up madness, anymore, in the book. There's some sense being made in Sam's life.

And finally the snake climbs. This is because, despite everything, there is a happy ending. Or at least, there's an ending of the current tale. I have already expressed my wish to write a sequel or two to this book, once I'm sure of what to actually write for them. The snake won't last that long, of course. I won't be letting a rain of post-its come down on me in my sleep for the sake of planning a trilogy of books based around the life of a writer. However, the image will always remain. This is my book, ladies and gentlemen, in its simplest form. It's winding and crazy and falling apart in the wildest part, but it's all there, all together, and it does appear to have an ending.

Over the next couple of weeks, I hope to add to the idea of this snake; there are chapters that may be added - inserts into the time-line - and ideas and relationships to explore. We are not our fathers and we are not the sum-whole of our parents' wishes. I think that's one of the things I really want to get written in this book. Sam's escape from his house, while still bound by its walls, is perhaps one of the things I really need to elaborate on. His ability to deal with his own depression, too, needs to be looked at, and the reasons behind everything. Furthermore, I need to develop his relationship with his cousin, Nick, who is in fact the real hero of the story. He's the one constant friend in Sam's life and he plays the biggest role in keeping him safe. Nick is the brother Sam never had.

I do hope you've enjoyed this little insight. I didn't actually intend on discussing the book, but in doing so I'm getting a better understanding of it for myself. So, two weeks until I go back to college. After today, that means I have nine days to work on the book, because I work weekends. Today will be a note-taking day, I think, and a re-examination of what I have to write. Edits for draft two will work on getting the new and the old pieces of writing to fit together into one book. I think my Sunday mornings could soon become Novel Writing Time, when I go back to college.

Found the Plot

Well, I've been writing this book on 9 days (I started a while longer than that ago, but I didn't write every day), and I've finally figured out where it's going. For once, I know what to write later when I get home. It's going to be longer than Stepping Forward, but it'll still be a novella. The plot isn't too complicated, but I don't intend it to be. It's sort of a confession of a book, an examination of the lives of friends, of love and longing and pain, and once again something that pushes into the boundaries of hypthetics, creating things in people that aren't there, or that aren't seen, at least.

In saying that... I had a plan to show a particular side of a character, who was based somewhat on a friend, because that side of him is almost non-existent as far as most of us have seen. Only, last night he showed it off, without really knowing that nobody had seen it much. I won't go into too much detail on it, but I thought it was a nice coincidence, and it just means that my character is a little more real than I'd first imagined.

When I get home, I'll be acting the arse and recreating a series of events that I found quite hilarious. If I finish the chapter tonight, I'll be moving on to something a little more difficult, which I'm not entirely looking forward to, except for the exploration part of the plot. That'll probably be carried into the next writing session, tomorrow morning, which will also see the start of the side of the aforementioned character that I'd wanted to show. The last chapter might also get written, if I focus enough. I'm working at five, so I have a good few hours to get work done on this thing. I only wanted to get it done by Sunday night, but now that I know where it's going I think I can finish before I go to work on Friday, or at the latest when I come home from a seperate shift on Saturday afternoon.

After that, the fun begins with another book. This one will probably be another novella - I don't plan on publishing them, but I like writing them for the experiences involved. You know, writing a book, creating characters, exploring ideas of friendship, love, life, death, mystery, getting to know people better. It's all fun, even if some of it is quite depressing. In fact, the next one is by and large all death. It's called The Great Leap. I actually can't wait to get started on it. I imagine it'll be of a similar length to Stepping Forward, but the ideas in it are a lot more difficult to get a grasp of. It calls into question matters of faith, and presents a continuous idea of always having a second chance. So, depressing but still with a bit of hope.

After that... Dignity. Though I may finish the second draft of Meet Sam instead. I'll have six days off work to get The Great Leap written, which is plenty of time if I have no plans (so far I have one plan, in the evening, when I rarely write anyway). Yeah, I think I'll finish Meet Sam. It could do with completion. When Dignity is written, then, I'll do the edits of Meet Sam, then start on my parody novel, The Masked Expellator, which looks at the life of a vigilante with a strange ability to throw up at will, and how he actually becomes a real hero. It's going to be utterly ridiculous, of course, but fun to write.

When all this is done - Meet Sam, Stepping Forward, The Great Leap, Dignity, The Masked Expellator and Love is a Remarkably Destructive Bitch - I'll be printing them in matching books, the difference being the colour of the cover, and perhaps some clip art on the inside. The books will be fun to have, and handy for having people read them. Meet Sam and Dignity are sort of free-for-alls, though I think a couple of people will want to read them first. Stepping Forward is currently in the possession of someone, who'll be the only person to read it until it gets a seal of approval. This is actually the same as The Great Leap, though I may make changes to my original idea to make it less like real life. Love is a Remarkably Destructive Bitch has to be read by two people before I show anyone else, and The Masked Expellator will find itself in the possession of the person who I first presented the idea to.

I've even kind of figured out the dedications... Meet Sam is just for friends in general, Dignity being for my fellow students at college, Stepping Forward for a particualr friend, Love is a... for two friends, The Masked Expellator for the person who gave me the idea, The Great Leap being for the friends who helped me through the darkest periods of my life (they won't be named individually.)

Okay... that was weird. I don't know how all that happened from I know where my book is going! I apologise. My ramblings generally just happen. Still, I hope you're enjoying following me on my journey to printing a number of books, single copies only. This summer will be amazing if I can get all this work done!

Writing Days

I have a very particular writing day; I've gotten myself into a habit, based on how tired I am at particular times of the day. I can't write too much at night, anymore, unless I'm still in the swing of things. I usually wake between seven and eight in the morning, so I'll shower by nine or shortly afterwards and get going for the day. I got over three thousand words done today. That's not my best, but I'd be more than happy to get that done every day.

Every day I write is the same, assuming I wasn't out the day before, and therefore extra tired. Admittedly, the tiredness can carry on for a few days. I've noticed two day gaps developing in my writing. Anyway, every day is the same if I'm not tired; I write after my shower (and my breakfast) until about one in the afternoon. At that point, I'll have lunch. I'll also have had about two or three cups of tea. I'm an addict at this stage. I'll get a cup at lunch, too, and one at hour later; by five or six, I'll have to stop to get dinner, and afterwards I'll be to tired to write anymore, as the day will have stretched on.

My writing day is also filled with music. I know some people can't write with music playing - I can't write poetry with music playing, for instance - but when it comes to fiction, I have to have music playing. I like my little writing montages. Many days it's the same songs, over and over again, a playlist on YouTube of songs recommended by Liam (he has the best and most varied taste in music out of anyone I know); unfortunately, the playlist is twelve songs long. So I switch between that, Alex Day's album on his website, and The Doors. Today, I did something special. I wrote along to The Beatles. I never listen to The Beatles. Ever. But I loved it. (It was Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts' Club) I also played Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon; I'm familiar with a few of the songs, but played as a whole... wow! The next step is to get my hands on a Bruce Springsteen album, more of The Beatles, a Bob Dylan album or two and something by Simon and Garfunkel. Apparently they're all awesome.

Writing along to music like this, I can get through a story in no time. It's my job, though I don't get paid. I just work throughout the day, getting lots written on my current work in progress, Love is a Remarkably Destructive Bitch. If I'm forgetting all about modesty, it's a pretty good book. I need to finish it within the next couple of weeks, though, because I have three more books I want to write before the summer's over, and I'd also like to get the second draft for Meet Sam written. I think that'll be next, so that when I've written the next of my books, The Great Leap, and probably Dignity, too, I'll be coming back to it nice and fresh. Once the edits on the second draft are done, I'll be working on a new idea, fresh off the press last night: The Masked Expellator. It's a parody superhero novel. I blame Fiona for it.

As you can tell, I'm a little bit busy, and still working weekends. Miley Cyrus might be getting a job soon, so my Adventureland days with her may soon be coming to an end... scratch that, they'll be coming to a pause. Adventureland doesn't end, it only takes a short break. We'll make sure to get more stuff done during the college year. It'll be awesome. The only upside for me (upside for her being money) is that I'll have lots of time to write in between the less frequent plans with other friends, so I should be able to get at least Love is a Remarkably Destructive Bitch written. Hopefully by the end of the month. I'd like to write The Great Leap and Dignity before I go back, but I'd have to have many days like today, or like June 25th - 9385 words that day! I'd be writing a novel a week if I wrote like that all the time!

But there you have it: my routine and my goals. My writing will slow down considerably once I go back to college, so I want to get as much done as possible within the next couple of months. The upside, of course, is that I have breaks of this length every year. For the rest of my life. (assuming I finish college and get a job as a teacher, and that I don't end up working as a writer full time, in which case I have a "break" like this for the rest of my life, during which I can write a dozen first drafts a year if I wanted to.)

Actually, I like that idea in the brackets. See, I don't just write novels. I write novellas too, now. They're shorter, but I still manage to get some depth into them. My trick is to limit the number of characters in them, so that there's not too much to have to do. I had two main characters in one I wrote recently called Stepping Forward, with a grand total of seven side characters, with only two of them having any narrative focus at all. And it's quite awesome, if I do say so myself. The only printed copy of it is in the possession of a friend for him to read before I can show anyone else.

Novellas are a wonderful thing, though. I mean, less publishers are likely to print them, but they're still fun to write, and if I actually become a successful, popular author, a publisher might take a chance with something like Stepping Forward, or it'd be published as a serial novella, or with two or three other books in one volume. Something cool like that.

Now I'm getting myself all caught up in hypothetics, again. As you can see, writing days leave me with lots of time to think too much. I've been told I do that too much, anyway. I'll leave this blog post here, before I write all about my plans for WORLD DOMINATION.

The Race

As of a couple of hours ago, I got half-way through the revising-edits of Meet Sam, correcting errors from draft 1. Now, the second draft isn't done until (a) all the edits have been done and (b) the additions have been made, as per my plans to expand on the relationships between characters and the characters themselves. It isn't until all of that is done that draft 2 is complete.

Setting myself an example from Going Postal, the film of which I have just finished watching, I'm racing. While I'm not travelling 1700 miles in a horse and carriage or fighting off the telegram/text message service, I'm working against something else - come Friday week, I will lose about two and half days of work. I have a delightful double-21st to attend to, and while I don't want to miss it, I also don't want to fall behind on my book. So, the race is thus:

I, Paul Carroll, hereby challenge time itself; I will finish the second draft edits of Meet Sam, at least insofar as all the errors have been corrected. Failure to do so will result in world-suck of the highest order, and I must buy the birthday girls a drink each, even if they're already fairly hammered by that stage. Success, on the other hand, will allow for a jolly good time, during which I may, as a result of my free will, purchase the birthday girls a drink each, if they so choose it. There may also be other spontaneous acts of getting friends intoxicated, though this is not mandatory.

I also have to bring my camera... that's entirely unrelated to the race, but there were very specific instructions from Liam not to bring a camera, and I know damn well why. So, naturally, I'm going to do the exact opposite. Sure, it'd be rude not to take any pictures. The girls may, and this is quite a strong possibility, all things considered, end up so drunk that they don't even remember the morning before the party. It has happened, on occassion, that people even forget they went somewhere. Funnily enough, someone who I saw last Wednesday wasn't in any photographs, and due to being a little bit drunk, she can't remember being in the pub. So... it's kind of necessary to prove to people afterwards that they were in the pub for the party... they won't remember it, most likely...

Back to the book! I have, in my time editing, isolated a few key areas that will allow me to expand on character relationships. There are only two chances to make the mother's position in the family and her relationship to Sam known, and these are pushing the boundaries of fiction a little bit. In contrast, there are five chances to expand on the father's relationships, and three chances, albeit three large chances, to expand on the relationship with the cousin, Nick. Added to this, there are four blanks that can be filled in, and based on my experience with a fifth one today, driving my character insane for a very short while (three minutes), I am fairly confidant that I can get a lot of work done inside the mind of Sam Richards. In short, I have a lot of opportunity to add to my word count, which has thus-far increased by approximately 2,500 words.

Also, based on last night's strange misadventures staying up past midnight (actually, staying up to two in the morning), I think I might be able to get quite a bit of work done on this novel. I have the rest of the night, about two hours tomorrow before I meet up with Sophie and a couple afterwards, and all of Saturday to work on this book, before I go to work on Sunday. I should be able to get at least half-way through the remaining edits before Monday, if I work at every chance I get. If I finish correcting the book by Sunday night, then I have four and a half days to get the rest of the work done. Did I mention I type very fast when I'm in writing mode, and that I can get through thousands of words per day? I've forgotten my record, but I can assure you, if I work that quick between now and Friday night, I will have the second draft completed entirely.

So, without further adieu, let the race begin!

Let's Revise, Shall We?

Editing is a bitch, sometimes. However, I have successfully gotten through Meet Sam with the red pen without setting it on fire. I consider this to be something of a success. Yes, there's a lot of red ink in it, but that just gives me work to do before I even get around to draft number two!

Speaking of draft two, that's when I bring in a lot of revision. One thing I'm considering changing is the type of drug my main character was addicted to in his past. It is, as it stands, cocaine. I figure, that's a bit weird, to only snort coke and do nothing else... so he's being a weed smoker, instead. He's going to have been a regular smoker to, which will result in a few fun moments in the book when he really needs to calm down, craving a cigarette, dying for one!

I also found a plot hole. Well, I knew it was there. But actually locating it was funny. I mentioned something, in dialogue, that the character doesn't find out until a bit later. This is the problem with extensive planning; if you know something is going to happen, one has to be careful not to let it be mentioned before it actually happens!

As well as that, I've located the times in the book that allow for relationships with three of the other characters to be expanded upon. They're kind of important... his only cousin and his parents... there are over a dozen time segments that I have in the book that will allow for this sort of stuff, directly. Then there's the four long time gaps I can work with! They will allow for much development of plot, as well as giving some history with and of the other characters. There's also a fun opportunity for some creative experimentation with the human mind.

For those of you who still don't know, Meet Sam is a book about writing, about Dublin, about relationships and how they can be royally fucked up very easily, about drugs, sex, music, freedom, the human mind and emotions. It's my best idea, ever. I've had some good ideas, I know that. I haven't used them all, and I haven't used them all correctly that have been used, but I know they were good ideas. This is from experience, I might add. I know good ideas when I see them, and these were good ideas. And Meet Sam is my best yet; not the narrator in the head sort of idea, I might add. That's just an added bonus. It's the result of having a narrator in the head of the main character that's the really good idea.

Also, as a funny note: the hero of the book isn't even the main character. Sam is the one everything happens to, while his cousin is the one who actually saves the day on a couple of occassions! This is where this book related to my life (except I can't go back and revise my own life - I can fix it, which I intend to, but I can't go back and actually change anything). In some respects, I relate to Sam quite well, but he's also made up of parts of other people I knew when I wrote the book. No one from college, I might add. I didn't know any of them, then. Okay, so he might be like a few of them, but they didn't directly influence the creation of him. Like Sam, I tend to find myself in a case of being a victim. This is the sad sort of crazy we both suffer from. Lack of decentring, really. But anyway, neither of us are really totally and utterly concerned with ourselves; there's usually someone else, our Abby (though my Abby isn't his Abby... my Abby isn't called Abby, for one thing!). The Abby of life is the one that makes everything worth it. It can be more than one person, of course, and it doesn't always have to be a romantic thing. Abby is salvation, release, freedom. I know several people that fit the Abby description. Heck, I even have a Nick in my life (Nick being the older cousin). This was a weird realisation: Nick is pretty much imagined quite closely to how my friend Liam actually is. And he's been that way since before I knew Liam. Funny, that. 'Course, the Nick figure is the one that helps out all the time and, like the Abby figure, isn't always exactly as I describe. Sure, there are other Nick figures in my life, and they're mostly female. It's to do with the influence the person has on my life that determines whether they're a Nick or an Abby.

But wait, there's more. There's the Alex figure. Alex is a little-mentioned character, whom I may or may not expand upon. Alex is the bad influence on life. Alex can be anyone. Anyone at all. You know peer-pressure? Yeah, your peers are Alex, if they're getting you into some sort of trouble. We all have an Alex in our lives. There's always someone to get us into some state of trouble, whether it's with someone else or with ourselves, someone to destroy us. And like Alex in the book, you can't entirely get rid of them.

And of course, we all have parents. Not biological parents, though that's true of the fortunate of us, but people who act like parents for us. There's always someone to care for us simply because of who you are. You aren't necessarily related, but that makes no difference. Family can mean anything, and you can have any number of people acting as parents for you at some stage or another!

(Funny thought, based on things teachers used to say to me: If this book ever shows up on the Leaving Cert syllabus, students just need to find this post and they've got lots of info on the book right from the author's mouth!)

So, that's it. After a few hours revising, this is what I can come up with. I have a deeper understand of my own characters, and of how I am essentially living my book every single day, in the ways I interact with other people. Hence why I put so much work into this thing. It's the best thing I've written because it can have such a large impact on my own life and on the lives of other people who can come to recognise the truly important people around them. And I really don't mean that to sound pretentious. I really don't. I mean it as a personal experience - I am happier in the knowledge of how people affect me. I know who to avoid and who to talk to, who's best for my mental and emotional security, who cares for me, and who doesn't. Mostly it's college people. That's the best thing that's ever happened to me - getting out of secondary school and into my college. My particular college. Another college wouldn't have done. It wouldn't have been the same. I wouldn't have made the amazing friends I made this year, who I know I'm going to miss seeing, even if I can talk to them online or on the phone or whatever.

Ah! Inspiration. This means I have to go. Thank you for reading all this... it's rubbish straight from my mouth, really.

It's Hot Out

Record high temperatures of the year, and where was I? In work. I know. It sucked. Now, normally I don't mind my job. I actually rather like it, when there's something to be done. But after the trolley was emptied and the kids' section cleaned, twice, there was nothing left to do.

Add in the heat, and you lose not only fluids, but customers. I got home at four, not knowing whether or not I'd get a chance to get in the sun. I asked my friend Eithne is she was at home, in Offaly. No, she hadn't gone home. She was still in Dublin.

Naturally, we went for a walk in the park, and had a little chat. Well, more than little chat. We talked about all sorts of things; fights we might have to prevent, people who are annoying, people who are sound, things we have to try do with our time in future summers. Eithne's one of the people I know I'm going to be in touch with years down the line. I really hope she's not the only one. People like Liam and Aidan, who I've spent ages talking to of late, and all the brilliant friends I became close to at the start of the year, rather than just knowing who they were, a bit... I don't know what I'd do without them all. And there are so many of them! I'm lucky to have that job for all the birthdays! Third year will be expensive for all those - so many 21st birthdays to go to, presents to buy for them, drinks to buy for them...

But I still plan on escaping somewhere. America. I'd like to go to America. In the meantime, I have work to do back here. I need to get qualified to teach, and I need to get my novel sent off, and actually finished. The second draft will be longer than the first; I explained this yesterday, about how I was suddenly realising I had so much more to write on than I had for my first draft of Meet Sam. And on Monday, I have to submit my poems to a group of people down in Limerick. Hopefully they'll like a few of them enough to want to publish them. And hopefully they don't get too depressed by them all! Subject matter... lost love (result of death), suicide, crappy life, guilt and death. Not exactly the most inspiring bunch of poetry, though you might argue they inspire deep emotions of pain and sorrow. My friends joke, when I tell them about these poems, that I'm going to be the really depressing poet on the Leaving Cert somewhere down the line that they're going to be forced to teach about. I would love that!

Right, time to leave you and love you, my dear readers. There's tea to be read and a novel to be edited! Goodbye and God bless!

Days off spent in College

...or, how I like to find new and interesting ways to procrastinate!

So I decided that I'd walk into college today, like I did yesterday, and walk home as well. Can I just say now, downhill walking is deceptive when you have to take the same route home! Nice and relaxing one way, torture the other way! It added five minutes to my journey having to trek uphill! That's not fair. I was hungry. On the brightside, I had had a breakfast and a lunch... which is more than I can say for Liam, who had to leave shortly after five to drive back to Meath. All of a sudden, Liam is broke and can't afford to even buy himself a cup of coffee (so I bought one for him...when someone says "I can't even afford a coffee" and you're spending the day in the same room as them studying, then you can't really ignore them if you can afford to buy them said coffee.)

So, ten kilometres... that's not fun. That's the total distance I walked today, excluding the travelling about the college. So I suppose it's not a total for the day, but more a total for the trips to and from college. (It just reminds me of Tommy Tiernan, saying he had to walk fifteen miles to school. Uphill. Both ways!)

On a lighter note... except for the weight in my bag... I had my laptop with me. I felt very happy to be able to save myself some printing money by just looking at documents on my laptop instead. Power Save is a hero. And then I had the IT guy from France set up the Internet for use in the college (which actually caused me problems when I got home...). So I was able to go on Facebook and Twitter in college, without having to go to the computer rooms!

I did do some study, of course. I'm a good little nerd. I got through the Galilean Ministry of Jesus (don't worry, I won't bore you with the details) and I got my notes on the Decalogue written up (the Decalogue, for those who don't know, is just the fancy term for The Ten Commandments).

But then there was more procrastination. Anthony and I traded YouTube knowledge; I showed him John WIlliams is the Man (look it up!), and the entirety of Meet Sam, the Movie, while he showed me things like a Carlow nutcase and a song about Jesus that was very hilarious but made no sense.

And as a closing term word... Paddy Reilly really ought to return to Ballyjamesduff sometime soon...

SAND

SAND, or: Summer, Assuming Nothing (Dis)Improves. This is what I am calling my intended summer; assuming nothing gets worse for me, and assuming nothing drastically improves very suddenly, I have a set plan for my summer months. It involves organised chaos, time and words. Lots of words.

These are all fairly well linked attributes of my three and a half months off; organised chaos is interwoven with time, and is part of the process of creating words. Time is vital to achieve words. Words are the offspring of organised chaos and time, and can actually create different worms of them. Yeah... I'm a bit weird that way.

Okay, the plan for the summer. I know you're all dying to know this. Let's take this as one big plan, with smaller sub-plans that interrupt other plans (organised chaos in practice!). There will be, in the social way of looking at things, a trip to the zoo, about a dozen trips to the cinema, four poetry nights, far too many nights out (the sort of things that will make my bank account angry), and more than a few trips into town to meet more than a few people, though not all at the same time. Ever.

That's one sub-plan. Another is writing. Writing a lot. James told me not to. He said, "Well don't spend all your time doing it." No, I will. Well, in accordance with the plan. The plan that insists on my writing being interrupted by friends. Damn them. Damn them to their happy little place that I wish I could stay in for longer than I do. Damn them there twice! (hey cool, I typed that without even looking at the screen, let alone the keyboard!)

The writing will consist of a number of things; it has sub-categories of its own! There will be the editing of Meet Sam, en masse until it's completion. During this time, there will also be the planning and writing of two novels: Dignity and Love, Sam. About two people know about Dignity (the aforementioned James, and Liam, because it was his Facebook status and his hilarious stories that inspired the idea of the book!). About one person knows about Love, Sam. That's Monica. I told her because she insisted on a sequel to Meet Sam, and then suddenly there was one. And another one. I don't know how that happened. There might also be the writing of a third novel, written entirely in letter and diary format, with another author. She's a very good friend of mine, so it could be very interesting! And then there's all the poetry I might write, because poems attack my brain spontaneously. And the plays I might write. And the short stories. And the auto-biography I've had in my head (a letter to my younger self), that, if I complete it, will be sold online.

And, believe it or not, there's more. I plan on trying to learn the ukulele. I have one, just sitting there like a beaten puppy, begging not to be hit by the door again as I open it. I know, what a cruel analogy!

And that's my summer. My whole summer in its entirety. I'll have to take a leaf from Liam's book and keep a record of everything I do during the summer. Every little detail, every little anecdote. Everything that can be fictionalised and used in Dignity or The Sam Richards Trilogy. This is SAND. As it is written, so it shall be. (and due to the nature in which in what written, just about anything can happen!)

Fantasy, Drama, Jonny and Sam

Over the past few days of silence, I've written quite a lot as regards miniature blogs. Due to Drama, I was unable to gain access to my blog, so I've decided to post three of my "mini-blogs" here... I will warn you, the third is not quite as mini as I thought it was, but it contains some wonderful introductions to books. I say wonderful... I mean they are rough approximations as to how I would like to start my books. You will understand.

Anyway, look out for the asterisks - they'll tell you when one blog post ends and another begins. The third post will end the entire post here. Tomorrow, I'm going to be lazy again and just give you two more mini-blog posts. They're about Drama, but the Awards are tonight, so I don't want to publicly jinx myself. Plus, this way I get to tell you how we did (both with the awards... and the alcohol I know my peers will be drinking...)

***

Status Update after a couple of hours of playing Final Fantasy 13... It's amazing! Perhaps one of the greatest games of all time; fantastic stuff! So far, not much by way of character growth; personalities are developed, yes, but with the removal of the EXP system, it's difficult to judge how well I'm doing. Not to worry.

Also, the Literary Den is three! Can't believe it's lasted this long! We're still going strong too. Okay, so maybe the forum's gone a bit quiet, but with our blog up and running the Den is never truly silent. I hope you'll join us as we keep going; there's always something going on, someone who can offer you some help or announce some new competition that's open, and I guarantee that you'll make new friends if you keep coming back, writers who know what you're going through, are experienced in a number of fields, and are always up to help new writers find their way, and to discuss the ways of the craft with those who are up for it. I sincerely hope you'll consider it.

***

Jonny Havron was found, but it's not good news. A fisherman in the Foss Basin found his body. I'm obviously a bit shaken up by it. I knew the chances if him coming back to us were slim, but there were chances all the same. Still, I can only think if his family. They'll never get to talk to their son and brother ever again.

And you know, he was such a nice guy too. I know it shouldn't make a difference whether or not someone is nice when this sort of stuff happens, but it does make a difference. Someone like Jonny, someone so harmless and friendly, couldn't have gotten himself into any sort of trouble. It's...well, it's a downright shame that this happened to him. We can only hope it was an accident, and not some fierce attack against Jonny. At least then we can let him rest in peace without the knowledge that he had been something we never thought he was, or that someone might mean him harm.

RIP Jonny Havron, writer and friend. You'll be missed sorely.

***

In my time in college I have discovered that time is relative to whoever happens to be concerned about it. Naturally I am concerned about time, particularly in my Lenten vow. One would imagine a day to end at midnight, but no- college has taught me that a night goes on so long as the body is willing. Admittedly my body is all that willing, but a cup is making way to convincing it to function as I type out my mini-blog segment of the day. So long as my fingers work and my mind is still in the same cycle if consciousness as it was this morning, I have not broken my rule of writing every day of Lent.

This relevance of time is a rather big thing in my novel Meet Sam. The protagonist, Sam Richards, has developed a thing of checking the time constantly. As such, my "chapters" are named after the time at which the watch is checked: it isn't rounded up or down, and it isn't something that vanished even as he sleeps, for his sleep is disturbed at various points throughout the day. The day, I might point out, is technically running onto two days, starting at eight in the morning and going on for twenty four hours. People who have read the book have always been curious about that; it's the first question I get asked, usually. It's also followed by "I really want to know what happens the next day." This next day has never been much of a thought to me, until recently. I keep thinking about how to write them, and what to have happen. One obvious suggestion has been made, something that became evident in the editing of the book. So, I have an idea for a sequel. I do think it's best served as a trilogy of books, though. Sure, there may be side books, like the untold story of Day 1 from Abby's point of view, and the story of Alex on that day, which isn't as easy to write. There are one or two texts from Alex in the book, but they're a start that can be made. How the book ends though...I'd nearly always known that. I just need to write the rest, and Sam's two extra books.

Time, in all of these stories, is important. Abby's life must become clear in this one day; the things Sam discovers about her, the things the reader learns, need to be expanded upon, while also developing the character of Nick. Yes, there are all three if Sam's books for that, but Nock won't ever have his own book. He's a support character for Sam and Abby, the one they both turn to. His personality isn't too clear for me yet to write a book about him, because right now all I have is his reactions to caring for Sam. As the relationships between Nick and the other characters develop, then maybe there's a chance for him to get the spotlight. But that's dependant on time, too. I really want to get the other four books done first, and then I'll have an idea about what to write about for Nick.

One thing I don't know yet, either, is how publishers or agents will react to the time constraints of the story. It's different, at least in the way that not many people have done it. James Joyce is one person, I suppose...but that's all I know. Whether people want a simpler to read Ulysses-type book is, as yet, unknown. Time will tell...

As to when all this writing will get done...well, there's always the summer. I have to finish editing first, but once I have a start on the next book, nothing will stop me.

Oh, I do know how to start Abby's book though. 'This is the story of one girl in Dublin, on the day that her life changed beyond her control. However, it must be noted that this day is, more or less, the imagined sequence of events that a writer could put together from the evidence given to him, told through the same medium as his own life; the story of Abby Moore is narrated by an Englishwoman in the head of the writer. While Abby is completely unaware of this fact, her day is somewhat controlled by the unfortunate madness that befalls writers in their lives: Abby's free will is choosing for her to follow the predetermined events of the day, much of which is subsequently filled in rather hastily by the preexisting thoughts of the aforementioned writer's participation in these events. It should also be noted that Abby Moore is a painter, and not a writer, and, as such, much of her life is imagined in an infinitely more complex way than the writer would choose. Such is the way of this writer that he has thrown himself into a task that he cannot begin to fathom until it's completion.'

There's also an intro to Sam's second book: 'Samuel Emily Richards had a rather strange desire to be spoken about in his most dangerously low moments in his life. As he himself is the writer, and a Lonely Writer at that, Sam subsequently finds himself with a narrator. In previous occurance, this has proven to be something of a success, though Sam is almost sure that on this second hearing, his remaining shreads of sanity should be taken into careful consideration. The existence of Sam's sanity has become, in these words, as doubtful as the voice in his head, and as such he cannot be deemed responsible for the actions he might find himself participating in. Unfortunately for Sam, his dignity prevents him from sharing his ill fortune of madness with the world, and so he stands on a cliff, ready to end things if his next breaths aren't the best of his life.

His phone began to ring.'

Written just now! Epic or what? I know where to go from there, too. That's both a good thing and a bad thing. Good in that I have a start, bad in that I don't have time to write the book yet!

Time, it seems, is an evil mistress, conspiring with my Muse to get the best of me at the worst moment. Thankfully, I am good at following my plot notes when I take them, and shall be able to combat this situation of timelessness with the writing a plot for book two, currently entitled Love, Sam. And with that revelation, I bid you adieu.

The Grapevine

In these days of darkness, I'm stuck on the other side of the grapevine, waiting, always waiting, to see if more news will pop up in the media about Hughes and Hughes or Jonny Havron. So far, nothing new. Jonny is still missing, though the police have increased the search, and have handed out 3,000 flyers and 20 A3 posters. I can only help it helps piece the events together.

As for H&H, I was with the former staff of my branch today, talking about it. The boss told us how a few rumours are flying around, like that some of the shops might be swept up by other businesses. I don't know too many of the details, and I can't confirm that any of this is true, but he reckons that we'll know a lot more within the next week. And we should get our last pay slip.

I feel better today, though. I think blogging about my pain over everything has helped. I slept soundly last night, for the first time in a week, I might add, and I wasn't massively depressed meeting up with everyone. It was nice, actually. Sure, they all still need jobs, but they're joining the dole and for the most part taking advantage of their time.

As for my own job hunt... I haven't started it. I won't get my redundancy pay if I'm hired beforehand, so I don't see the point. Plus, I can use this time for college work and for editing. Most of the way through Meet Sam now, before I go into the rewrite. I haven't done this much work on the book since I first wrote it in November 2008. Sure, the word count isn't jumping up by several thousand a day, but I'm working out the finer details of the plot, and noticing the way I wrote the book all over again. I don't want to sound boastful, but I actually love this book! I love the way its written, the way the story is told, everything about it, except for the little bumps that need smoothing out. That's a good sign, I reckon. It means that I can finish this project, because it's something I really care about, something I can stand to work on for a long time.

Who knows, it might get me into the published author world... A man can dream, can't he?

The Shanster

If you read my blog post yesterday, you would have read that I sent an email to Darren Shan regarding my joblessness and the woes around it. Well, he's taken the liberty of posting my email on his blog, with his response, my response, and then some additional made-of-awesome comments to go along with it.

As a direct result of this blog post, I am jumping off the walls with excitement, and I can barely contain myself long enough to type this post. Just thinking about it gets me ecstatic all over again.

I encourage you to go read the post, here. It's really awesome.

In other news, that isn't related to Darren Shan, I got most of my essay done for my Justice and Peace module. I had thought I was finished, until I discovered that the word count was meant to be two hundred words higher than what I'd written. Personally, I blame the lack of a posted word count in the email the lecturer sent us... but don't tell his son I said that. (I'm just complaining for the sake of it, of course; I'm sure I can find something to write about, with regard to a message of justice in the book of Amos in the Old Testament).

Also managed to buy some paper. It's been a while... and we were running out. I think my dad is repaying me... if not, he's not allowed use the paper. I'm unemployed, and I demand to have full use of what I pay for. (Now I'm being bitter for the sake of it...)

With said paper, I printed out a good few more pages of Meet Sam to be edited as soon as this darned essay is done. And my tutorial work is finished... And when I can successfully begin my coursework journal for my Fiction to Film module... which all requires an essay. Bugger. Well, I will edit, I promise. I have more time at the weekends than I used to, so I will. I will. Stop looking at me like that, I WILL!

*ahem* I was talking to you, reader. There's no one in my head who ought not be. Fictional characters, yes, but they ought to be there.

I sound crazy...

Back to Shan related news, there's only two full months between me and The Thin Executioner. I know what you're thinking - "Paul, you just lost your job! Should you really be thinking about buying more books?" The short answer, yes. The slightly longer answer, Yes, I need them. The unnecessarily long answer...

Books keep me at the stable balance between normality and insane asylum. Without access to literature, my mind melts into a state of not being able to function properly, which then needs to be treated with several intense doses of reading before I can write again. By several, I mean about a dozen. By intense, I mean four hours at a go. Otherwise the process takes much longer, and while I can write, I can't write anything that's worth reading. Even with editing. This is partially why I'm editing now, and not working on something new. I haven't had the chance to dive into a book properly since Mr Mumbles, which didn't take very long. I have to whip out a novel of some description tomorrow or my brain will turn to mush. Fact.

And before I go, apparently I don't want to know what Maureen Johnson did before she was a full time author... Gotta love Maureen for her small bouts of revealed insanity.

First Day

I've never experienced a Saturday off that I wasn't supposed to have off. The closest I got to that was when the English Paper 2 was shown on the wrong day in the Leaving Cert, and we had to sit the backup paper that Saturday. But other than that, I've been in work most Saturdays, or in work the Sunday instead.

Admittedly, I was still a little spooked about not having a job. I ended up on the phone to Sandra, one of my ex-collegues at Hughes and Hughes, and she's just as shaken up about it. And she almost lost her dog, but that's a different story. She hadn't heard anything about the company collapsing like this either. She did know that those present at the time of closing had paperwork to fill out... that'll be a fun thing to do... not!

I watched Glee to cheer myself up. Okay, so I almost cried at one point, but the destruction of teenage life kind of does that to me. Actually, the destruction of any believeable life in fiction does that to me. Not a bother on me in a ridiculously murderous movie like From Paris With Love, where many people get killed... they weren't believeable deaths. But Glee set me off, almost. At least the songs were great!

I emailed Darren Shan as well, to see if he might be able to shed some light on his own experiences with unemployment and writing. He went through practically the same thing, except his jobs weren't funding his writing, and he willingly gave one up. But he gave me some very sound advice and made me realise that I should take advantage of the time I have and do some work. As a result, I wrote a very short story that won't be used...ever... and around 13 Doctor Haik-Who. Okay, exactly thirteen. And I edited the same number of pages of Meet Sam, before I ran out of printed material. It was a load of fun though!

I printed that email too, to make sure I can always look at it and remember that I have something many people lack - time to write. Hughes and Hughes didn't give that to me, Darren Shan did. I might have wasted the day if I hadn't been told that.

Of course, I spent time watching television too. I watched Nanny McPhee with my mum while we had dinner, and Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer. I've seen the latter before, and I always enjoy it. The former... didn't expect it to be as fantastic as it was! It certainly attributed to the brightening up of my day (which really only felt great after Darren Shan's amazing email!)

Too late to do any work now, but I'll be waking up to an essay on Justice and Peace. 1000 words. It's not too bad, and if I can get it done quickly, then I have time during the week to do other things... like my tutorial work. But I'm going to catch up on everything. I'm promising myself that.

Holy Cow. Ever get one of those "I just realised something" moments? Well, I did... just now. Yes, I voiced my surprise in my blog, sue me. (don't... I'm unemployed and can't afford to pay you). Well, I just realised that the Irish Student Drama Association competition is next week (starting the 8th). Drama is almost over for the year! Ah!

Oh, brightside of yesterday I never got around to, because of the joblessness... well, I went to the cinema, saw the aforementioned From Paris With Love, and Eileen texted to say that we have our tickets to One Republic in April! Good thing I forked out the money for that before I found out about work, or I might have had to change my mind!

Hmm, did I just see the brighter side of life? So much for my misery of yesterday!

Struggling with Words

As I write the articles for The Anonymous Writer, I find myself stuck for words. My planned article on social justice just leaves me with a blank. How do I write something original on current affairs? (In case you don't know, it's impossible to write something original on current affairs without discovering something more current than the present...)

Then there's the fiction section... the story I want to write right now isn't what I want to self-publish. I want to submit it, if I ever write it. I think it might stand a chance at actually getting publishing in a magazine... if I ever write it.

And the book reviews? Well, I'm too lazy for that, I suppose. And I keep changing my mind about my Music section. (Okay, so in that case my "struggling for words" situation is struggling for words I want to keep on the page...)

Throw in edits for Meet Sam... well, for the past six months I've had the same pages ready to edit and I just haven't done it. But Monica read it in a day and loved it, and wants me to write a sequel (coincidentally the day after I decided on possible titles for sequels!) I need to edit more.

*sigh* Any writerly woes, anyone? (yes, writerly)

Weekend War, Part 1

Well, it's the weekend. You know what that means? Time for a Weekend War with Eileen. See, on Facebook she started listing all the things she was doing, or the little treats she was going to eat, and I thought, "Why isn't my weekend that good?"

Now I'm in a personal war with her to have the better weekend. As we all know, of course, the weekend starts on Friday night. At least it does in Ireland, or else the pubs would be empty. So...how have my hours been spent?

Well, last night I went to see Up In The Air, staring George Clooney, and a cast of people I've never heard of. It was a "rom-com" without much romance at all. More like casual sex. Delightful. And the comedy... well, it wasn't in-your-face comedy like The Hangover; it was more like dry humour, where the characters just had to speak in some cases to be funny. And I went to see it with friends from secondary school, so even better!

Today... well, I was in work. Now, that might sound bad, but it was only for six hours and the wonderful Alan O'Neill, one of the coolest teachers ever from my secondary school dropped in. We had a chat about stuf in general, like college, and the school, and it made my day a little better. And at lunch I treated myself to a cake from the bakery... it's okay, I'm allowed to...

Got home at about a quater past four, or thereabouts anyway, and got on the PC to play a Warhammer game. It's explosive, it's violent and it's virtual - perfect!

And later? Well, later's the fun part - "lads night" at Ciarán's house to celebrate his birthday! (note to self - wrap his present!). I've no idea what we'll be doing, but it should be fun. Plus I get to see all my old friends again. Yay!

Tomorrow will be boring in comparison unless I do something, so I'm going to work on the Poetry Against Cancer book and do some editing work on Meet Sam. (which, by the way, a lecturer in my college liked! Yuss!) I also have to place in an order for some books and send a letter to America - fun! And I get to watch Heroes, which I have to record tonight due to lack of being home.

Oh, and during this blog post... I lost the Game. Sorry everybody.